From reading the previous post, you’ll know that this year has been one of self-discovery, where I’m learning to spend time alone, and make the most of it. But, like everything in life, jumping into the deep end isn’t always easy. Building confidence takes time, and it all starts with small steps.
At the end of April in 2024, after a few weeks of solo days out and getting comfortable in my own company, I found myself wanting more, though, I wasn’t quite sure what. I had a week off work coming up, and while I’d usually plan it with family or friends, something in me said to make this week about me. My boyfriend and I hadn’t booked it together; I’d been working long hours at two jobs, sometimes 60+ hours a week, and had finally reached a point where I needed a break. Since he couldn’t take the time off on such short notice, I decided to do something different and embrace the chance to spend this time on my own.
Whenever I had some spare time, I’d search for something different to do during my week off- new places to explore, or a different kind of day out. I considered taking the train to London, or going to the cinema, but nothing really felt like something I wanted to do. Then, one morning, sat at my kitchen table with a coffee, browsing on my laptop, the idea of going away on my own for a few days popped into my head. Immediately I thought, That’s ridiculous. I can’t go on a holiday by myself. Who does that? I have a boyfriend. What would people think? ‘Why does she want to go on on her own instead of wait until they can go together? Why not ask a friend, or family? Going alone isn’t going to be any fun!’
I’m quite the over thinker, and anyone who knows me would tell you I tend to imagine what others might think of me- usually without reason. But, despite the initial doubts, the idea of a solo trip stayed with me. And the more I thought about it, the more exciting it seemed.
Somewhere I have always wanted to visit is the Lake District. I didn’t know much about it, other than its reputation as a beautiful location. It’s quite a trek from where I live- about 300 miles away. Another option I considered was a mini road trip to the south coast of England, exploring places like Dover, Brighton, or Cornwall- all places I had never been but loved the idea of visiting. I thought maybe I could find some affordable hotels, like a Travelodge, and stay one or two nights at a time, exploring different locations throughout the week.
Every time I entertained these ideas, I thought, That’s just silly, you can’t do that! But at the same time, I couldn’t shake the excitement of how much I’d love it.
I decided to start looking into both options. First, I researched places to stay along the south coast. It was about 130 miles away, and I thought I could possibly drive- after all, it didn’t seem like a bad distance. Plus, it was partly a familiar journey since I have family in the Surrey and Hertfordshire areas, so I was used to some of the roads. I also began considering campsites, as hotels – even budget options like Travelodge – were surprisingly expensive. The thought of camping alone, though, was something I couldn’t quite picture myself doing, I’m not great at putting up a tent even with someone else, let alone by myself! It didn’t feel like the safest option either. So, I shifted my focus back to the Lake District, which deep down, I knew was where I really wanted to go, even if it felt so far away.
I decided I didn’t want to drive to the Lake District by myself; the nearly six-hour journey was daunting, and just thinking about it made me feel uneasy. So, I started exploring other methods of travel, like trains. This is when I began to understand just how remote many areas of the Lake District are and how challenging it would be to reach them without a car. If I relied on public transport during my stay, Windermere seemed to be the best choice since it had a train station.
I could take a train from my nearest town straight to London, followed by two tube journeys to catch the Avanti West Coast train from Euston Station all the way to Oxenholme in Cumbria, then a local train from there to Windermere. Although I had traveled by train plenty of times, it was mostly for single journeys. The thought of navigating all those changes—especially alone—made me nervous. I started to wonder if this was something I should attempt alone. What if I got lost or accidentally boarded the wrong train? For some, a journey like this might be a breeze, but for me, the anxiety almost prevented me from booking the trip entirely. I know I’m not alone in feeling this way.
I set aside those thoughts for the moment and began searching for hotels. While it wasn’t cheap, I understood that, like anything else, you get what you pay for—especially when it comes to location in the Lake District. I discovered that guest houses are quite popular in the area. Essentially, a guest house is a type of lodging where the owner has converted a house into a small hotel.
I found one that caught my eye: it featured a bedroom with an ensuite bathroom, so I wouldn’t have to share with anyone else. Although it didn’t have a kitchen, it came equipped with a kettle and mugs. I researched the reviews, which were excellent. The guest house seemed ideal, located between the towns of Windermere and Bowness-on-Windermere, just a 10 to 15-minute walk from each. It was also about a 20-minute walk from the train station, and there was a bus stop conveniently located at the corner of the road.
At the time, the guest house offered a promotion: if you booked two nights, you got a third night free. I thought three nights would be a good length of stay. I didn’t want to overdo it in case I struggled with traveling alone, but I also wanted enough time to explore.
For a couple of days, I toyed with the idea but couldn’t quite bring myself to book anything. To be honest, I think a part of me believed I wouldn’t actually go through with it. One evening, my partner came home from work, and we chatted about my plans. He thought the guest house looked lovely and would be a safe place to stay. Whenever I voiced doubts, saying things like, “I don’t know if I can actually do this,” his response was always, “Why not? Just go for it! You know you’d be fine; you’ll figure it all out as you go!”
Later that evening, while sitting on the sofa with the laptop still open, I had a sudden thought: “Oh my god, I’m just going to book it. What do I have to lose?” It’s a strange feeling to describe; it was as if my hands were moving to complete the booking, while my mind was saying, “What are you doing? You can’t actually do this!” But in that moment, I knew I was going to book it- and I did.
I booked the guest house first, followed by the train tickets. Immediately afterwards, I was hit with a wave of anxiety and excitement all at once. “I can’t believe I’ve just booked it! I’m actually going!” My boyfriend responded with excitement, fully supportive of my decision. He reassured me that I would be absolutely fine and that I could do this! He made me promise that if I needed him at any point during the trip, if I was worried or anything happened, I was to call him. I think deep down he was a bit nervous about me going, as this was unlike anything I had ever done before.
I spent the rest of the evening browsing through the guest house pictures on the website and researching different places to visit and activities I could do while I was there. Unsure where to start, I simply Googled “things to do in Windermere” and explored the area on Google Maps, zooming in on various parts to see what caught my eye. That evening, I felt a mix of excitement and anxiety, with a pit in my stomach that made me feel sick. I hardly slept at all that night.
Sometimes, you have to really push yourself. The easiest option is always to opt out. But I thought, what do I have to lose? By booking the trip and making the plans, I would give myself the best chance of actually experiencing it. The worst that could happen is that I decide not to go and potentially waste my money if I can’t get a refund. But if I never go for it, it will never happen!
Thank you for reading my second blog post! In the next one, I’ll share all about the journey there. I knew I would be nervous, but I struggled with anxiety much more than I had anticipated. I’ve come so far since then, and I can’t wait to relive it all with you, the good and the bad!
If you’re inspired by my journey and are considering embarking on your own solo adventures, check out my ebook, Alone But Never Lonely: A Beginner’s Guide to Solo Adventures. It’s filled with tips and insights to help you navigate your path to self-discovery and adventure! You can access it from the menu at the top of the page in my Etsy Shop.
